Who Is This Guy Anyway?

I am as the PC phrase goes Single by Divorce. (Actually that's not true, I'm Single because I'm smart! :-)). I was married at age 28, and was divorced in June of 1981. So as you can see I’ve been on just about all sides of the single issue – never married and divorced, each for a loooong time!

Introduction

1) What we want to focus on is living as a Single Christian in a way that would please God.

a, Are there things unique to being Single that God want us to understand and act upon?

b, YES! This workshop is aimed at finding out and motivating us to DO them!

2) To do this we must look at 1 Corinthians 7. This is a very difficult passage to interpret because...

a, It's been misused in Church History - as teaching celibate clergy, the superiority of singleness over marriage, etc.

b, It's also suffered recently from people so marriage minded that they go to almost any length to deny some startling things Paul says here.

4) So let's be clear.

a, No one in their right mind is saying that being either single or married is superior to the other.

b, We ARE saying however that this passage is extremely relevant to being single. It's inspired by the Holy Spirit and must be obeyed!

c, This is a workshop on being Single- we will therefore happily ignore any and all references to and commands for the married!

1, What Paul says in 1 Corinthians 7 is aimed at single’s who do not have children. If you're a single parent some of what I say in this workshop either not apply to you are not apply to you as much as it does to childless singles.

A) Good Is Single- Single is Good!

[Note the use of Arby's slogan to enforce this alien thought!]

1, The Greek word translated "Good" in these three verses is Kalos.

a, It's root meaning is "healthy, strong, excellent, organically fit, useful, sound."

b, As time went by in secular Greek it grew to include the idea of aesthetic judgments and then moral goodness and excellence.

c, Finally Kalos came to mean "The total state of soundness, health, wholeness and order, whether in external appearance or internal disposition. For the Greek then the term applies particularly to the world of the divine." [Dictionary of New Testament Theology, Vol. 2, Pg. 104]

d, Paul tells us three times that it's good to be Single- so don't miss the point!

e, My favorite word to translate Kalos is "excellent," or "excellence!"

2, If you're Single you are NOT a second class citizen!!

a, You're not weird, not a geek, not a loser!

1, Or if you are it's not because your single!!

b, You are in s state described by Paul, writing under the direct inspiration of the Holy Spirit, as morally excellent, whole and healthy!!

1, How many of us look at our Single status that way??

B) Remember this - Don't Forget It!!!

a, Remember this the next time someone tells you that you can't be whole unless you're married.

b, People who say this are Biblically uninformed (at least on this point) and are, whether they know it or not, speaking ignorantly!

c, The message of this passage is extremely counter-cultural.

d, It's also counter-church-cultural.

1, Thanks to our "Focus on the Family" mentality.

C) It's A Choice! (7:7-8)

1, Don't tell me you don't have a choice!

a, I can marry off anyone in about 2 weeks!

b, I don't guarantee that you'd like them - or even want to share the same zip code with them - but they'd marry you!

2, One reason that you aren't married is because you have standards - and are therefore making choices!

a, Let's begin to see ourselves as people making choices under the will of God - and not as victims!!

3, Reigning in Life - Romans 5:17b

a, This view empowers us!

b, Reigning through life isn't positive thinking - it's letting God's power flow through you.

c, This set us free from seeing ourselves as victims!!

4, Our Choices will be based on our gift-mix.

a, 1 Cor. 12-14.

A) NOT a Waiting Period 'Till (or between) Marriage!

1, If our Single status is to be excellent, we can't view it as an unpleasant void until marriage!

2, Instead view it - for however long it lasts - as an opportunity to serve the Lord.

B) We Should Stop Whining About Being Single!

1, Don't complain about being lonely and unhappy - instead seek contentment in whatever state you're in!

a, We find this not through being married or single, but in Christ!!

C) This Is Doesn't Mean You Can Never Get Married! (7:28)

1, It simply means that while you're Single- BE single! - do something with the state you find yourself in!

A) Marriage Divides Your Focus

1, This doesn't mean that married people can't be spiritual.

2, It does mean that for them to stay focused on the Lord is harder than it is for a Single Christian.

a, It also means that they must focus on issues we don't have too and that effects them too.

3, Paul says this not to "restrict" us.

a, restrict = "to be roped in" - lassoed!

b, This isn't to bind us up in restrictions - but to set us free to be the men and women God calls us to be!

B) Walking As A Christian Single- Focused on Service!

1, It's time we Christian Singles GREW UP!!

a, Stop Whining about being single!

b, Stop accepting being pushed into the Single Ghetto in our churches!

c, Stop programming our Single’s Groups like an Adult Youth Group!

d, It's sad but true that a rule of Single’s Ministry is that Single’s are immature, unreliable and flaky!

1, I don't know about you but I resent being thought of that way - even if it is sometimes true!!

2, We must take up the mantle of leadership.

a, Where are the Single Elders and Deacons in our churches?

b, God wants us to use our time and talents for Him, and we should be in the forefront of service in our churches.

3, We should be actively involved in balancing the church.

a, As Paul says married people and single people have different concerns and worries.

b, Our married leaders can help us focus on meeting the personal and family needs among us.

c, I believe that Single Christians should be making sure that in the process churches don't lose Christ as their central focus!

4, Examples of focus problems in churches

a, "Family Centered Churches" - where's that in the Bible?

b, The awful ordeal of Valentine's Day!

C) Christian Singles - Engaged In Excellence!!

1, Whatever we are doing it should be done with Kalos, for the Lord!